My Kindergartner

 Ben is in Kindergarten!  He will be gone all day at school.  My soft-hearted, fun-loving little boy will learn to read this school year, he will carry his own cafeteria tray, and he will make friends outside of me.  That's hard to swallow.  I'm so proud of the boy he is and can't wait to see what God has in store for him this year.  We've been getting all ready for his big debut as a Kindergartener for quite awhile. 

Our preparations started off with a dentist check up.  For Ben, the anticipation of the unknown is way worse than actually doing it (kind of the theme of this whole Kindergarten thing).  He was almost physically sick waiting (and waiting, and waiting) in the reception area to see the dentist.  He rocked his appointment!  No cavities!!  But even more exciting for me, he was cooperative and calm.  I'm so proud of the way he overcomes his fears.

 

 

Next on our checklist was a visit to the eye doctor.  It was this appointment for Kate that we found out she needed glasses.  I had no idea she wasn't seeing clearly, so I wasn't sure how this would end up.  Once again, he did awesome.  He followed directions and asked lots of really good questions.  His vision is perfect.  We did find out he has a color deficiency, only meaning he can't distinguish between colors that are close in hue...but nothing that will effect him in school.

I had asked Ben several times about school supplies.  He just wasn't interested in it.  He said he wasn't going to school so he didn't need supplies anyway.  He's not much of a shopper either, but I finally convinced him to go with me.  He did have a good time searching the shelves for what was on the list.  After shopping him I treated him to a sneak peek of the playground at his new school. 

 

 

Last Monday was Kindergarten orientation.  Drew met us at Ben's new school.  We took all his school supplies in and got them put away.  He met his teacher, toured the school, and saw many of his classmates.  I'm so, so thankful that his best friend Jake is in his class as well as a couple other good buddies Colin and Carter.  It will be so comforting to have some familiar faces (hopefully they don't have too much fun together!!).  Ben was really dreading this day.  I held his hand as he walked up to the school.  He said, "I don't think I'm ready for this" about 10 times.  I couldn't say anything, I knew I'd cry.  Once we got in to his room he really pulled it together.  He was smiling and having a good time putting everything right where it goes in his new classroom.  It was a good afternoon and eased my mind a bit.  I know he's still nervous, but I pray it eased his a bit too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

There was only one thing left to do before the big day...haircuts!!  The day before school we visited Aunt Jenn's salon and I tried to soak in the last day of summer with my babies.

As I look back at these pictures they show all smiles.  In between those smiles was lots (and lots) of anxiousness and worry.  It is so painful to watch Ben struggle with the fear of the unknown.  He wears his heart on his sleeve.  He is sensitive, and emotional and I love that about him but pushing him to this next adventure in life is tough.  He continually told me he wasn't going to Kindergarten.  Honestly, I wanted to hug him and tell him he didn't have to go!  Growing pains are not fun.

Well guess what happened today....Ben went to Kindergarten!  The anticipation is finally over.  He woke up happy this morning.  We had special pancakes and blueberry muffins.  He was cheerful and talkative.  He let me take his picture with out complaint.  As we walked into the school he only said once, "I don't think I'm ready for this."  I couldn't respond because all I could think was, "I'm not either!".  We saw his teacher, she grabbed his hand, showed him where to put his lunch box, told him to give Mom a quick hug, then she turned him by his shoulders and led him to his seat.  It happened so fast; just like that he was gone.  He didn't cry.  He didn't look confident, but not a single tear.  I feel lost.  I looked at the clock countless times today wondering what he's doing right now...  Is he happy?  Is he scared?  Does he miss me as much as I miss him?  Is he ready?  Because I know I'm not!  I can't wait to pick him up.  I hope he is smiling from ear to ear.  I hope he's having the best day ever.

UPDATE:  I have my baby boy back!  He had a smile on his face when I picked him up and he said he had fun.  The details are far and few between, but I'm thinking it was a good day.   He's tired.  The only thing he ate for lunch is a pickle (so he has to be hungry too!  He ate the rest of his sack lunch in the van on the way home).  I heard tidbits about his day here and there throughout the evening...the toys are awesome, the boy sitting next to during rug time is annoying (he hums), he hopes it doesn't rain tomorrow so they can use the playground, they read "The Kissing Hand" the same book we read at bedtime last night....  I hope he can focus on the positive, relax, and find happiness at school.  It's only just begun.